Welcome back to the second chapter of the Slobacy! Here, I’m working on a legacy with the dateable male slobs from Nightlife, and right now, we have Korey Collins here, a proud father of twin girls and his, uh, loving wife, Iama.
Sorry for the Lady Gaga song reference in the title. I just didn’t know what to call this chapter, even though that’s what half this chapter is going to be about, bad relationships. Now that I ruined the surprise, let’s get this show on the road.
In the last chapter, the girls grew up badly, go figure, and nobody was happy with their living conditions.
“Ha ha, daddy stinks!” ~Bayonette
“Jeez, both of you don’t have to laugh at me. I guess you get your meanness from your mother.” ~Korey
Actually, they are both pretty nice. I don’t know where it comes from.
Korey and I were the only ones that were happy the kids survived their baby years, as usual.
“What the-! Get off the bed! That’s not a plaything! That cost me a lot of MONEY!” ~Iama
Iama is never happy with anything. My founder is being punished for attempting to steal my simself’s son’s inheritance, and now she’s stuck founding a poor legacy. She’s mad all the time.
“Hello? Can I help you, neighbor?” ~Korey
“No, but I can help myself… to your paper!” ~Ganondorf
Ganondorf! That’s rude! They are in poor enough shape as it is without you taking their paper!
“But, I’m the King of Garudo THIEVES! I’m surprised I haven’t come by already for their paper! Besides, that Korey guy stole my haircut!” ~Ganondorf
“Sigh, I hate this door. It symbolizes my oppression of my lower class and reminds me that my life will forever be barred from happiness and a better life for me and my children.” ~Korey
Don’t worry, Korey. One day, we will get a new door!
One day, I was playing with my simself’s son, and realized he still had all the portraits of Iama that were at the old manor of mine. I figured it wouldn’t hurt anyone if I sent them over to my legacy house, so I had him gift them all to Iama’s. They may not boost the environment a whole lot, but at least they add something to the house besides the little sticker flowers in the corner I’ve had since forever.
“Ugh! You stink, Korey! Even my well-taken photos can’t cover up the stench you left in my bathroom!” ~Iama
Needless to say, they don’t cheer Iama up.
“Hey mom, hey mom! Look at me! I’m the head of my class, me and my sister both! We have straight A’s! Do you love us now?!” ~Silhouette
“Sigh, I’m sorry Dock, my kids are always talking or screaming about something. Just ignore it. It’ll go do its homework or sit in its room or something!” ~Iama
Where’s Korey when you need him?! He’ll give you the attention you deserve, Silhouette!
Great, I can already see we are going to have a problem with the telescope.
“Come ON, Sabrina! This is enough punishment, isn’t it? I’ve had two brats take away my perfect figure, I live in a box, and I’m constantly miserable! Can’t I have a nice villa home at least?!” ~Iama
“NO! Now stop spying on me and my house!” ~Sabrina
“Does this happen all the time?” ~Dock
“Every time I come here, it sure does.” ~Gary
“Hey, why aren’t you kids in school today?!” ~Iama
“Mom, you don’t know? It’s Saturday! We don’t go to school on the weekend!” ~Bayonette
“What?! You mean I have to spend the whole morning with you two?!” ~Iama
“I may not look like it now, kids, but back when I was your age, my dad let me go on three cruises! I went to the Bahamas twice! I had everything I wanted as a child, and my dad even named one of the ships after me!” ~Iama
“Three cruises, mom? You couldn’t even go on a ride in a rowboat now up the town river because you couldn’t pay gas money to get there. I seriously doubt you had cash once upon a time!” ~Silhouette
“You ruined my LIFE! I had everything, and I could still have everything, if you hadn’t butted into my life! Now my kids think I’m a joke because I can’t prove to them that I was once part of the Golddigger family! Consider us life ENEMIES!” ~Iama
“You… you SHOVED ME! And after I gave you a second chance at redeeming yourself and giving you the honor of being my legacy founder! This is what you GET for flirting with my ex and stealing my son’s stuff! Now get in the kitchen and make grilled cheese for your kids like a good mother should!” ~Sabrina
Needless to say, Beth was way ahead of me on that. Too bad she’s the worst cook in the world.
Uh, Beth, you left the stove on!
“I did what?” ~Beth
“Oh crap, NO! Not again! I’m having another Goopy household flashback! I don’t want to burn up again!” ~Beth
“Hey, what are you doing in my house?” ~Korey
“Just saving your family from losing everything they own. Remember to be safe next time, you loser!” ~Maura
“Thanks for watching the kids today, even though it wasn’t necessary since I was here all day. We don’t have money, so is it OK to pay you with kindess?” ~Korey
*FART*
“Oh for PETE’S SAKE” ~Beth
“I’m just going to take your easel. You don’t need it and I need payment!” ~Beth
Sigh, after this, I’m sad to say I had to let Beth go. I couldn’t afford her, and Korey was home half of the time anyway. They don’t need Beth anymore.
“HEY! What is WRONG with you, you freak?! How DARE you grope me like that!” ~Iama
“Wh-WHAT?! What are you talking about, I’ve groped you many times before!” ~Korey
“Yeah well, that was then, this is now! I don’t want you anywhere NEAR my butt ever again!” ~Iama
“What’s the matter with you?! We are married! This is the kind of stuff we do!” ~Korey
“Well can I at least make out with you?!” ~Korey
“EW! NO!” ~Iama
“WHAT?!” ~Korey
“What has gotten into you?! Why are you pushing me away like this?! You were fine making out just the other day!” ~Korey
“Well, I’m NOT fine now, and I never will be! Don’t TALK to me, Korey!” ~Iama
Wow, didn’t see this one coming at all.
One day, they were fine with each other and the next day they fall out of love. I don’t get it. Then again, Iama always has a stick up her butt. It could have been anything.
Meanwhile, the children still didn’t have a birthday this time because we are still too poor to afford cake. Looks like they will be without a party until they become elders. Really sad.
“Look, Bayonette! We grew up well this time! At least we have that!” ~Silhouette
“Yeah, but we look like poor people with our default tops and skirts. Quick, let’s sell the kitchen table and go get new outfits!” ~Bayonette
“Hey girls. Nice to see you grew up great. Just telling you that your mother and I got into a fight, so I’m sleeping on the couch tonight. Keep it down when you come back in.” ~Korey
“OK, Dad. Oh, and by the way, you set the kitchen on fire.” ~Silhouette
“I did? OK, let me call the fire department right quick.” ~Korey
“So you must be Meadow Thayer! Glad to meet you, Meadow! I’m a big fan of your history!” ~Silhouette
“Oh spare me the suck up routine. Like I really care what kids like you really think of me. I raised six of you here, I know how kids work, and you aren’t getting anything out of me!” ~Meadow
“Bayonette, I had a feeling that woman didn’t like me.” ~Silhouette
“Well, of course not! We are legacy kids! No self-respecting sim is going to really like legacy kids! We take up too much attention away from them!” ~Bayonette
“I think you are right.” ~Silhouette
Anyway, here are my teen kids, and so far, I like Silhouette the best because of her ears.
Silhouette rolled Wealth and Bayonette rolled Pleasure, just like their parents. Joy.
Silhouette has 6/6/9/5/6 and Bayonette is 10/1/4/10/10. I want to say they got it from their father, but Bayonette is too neat for that.
So, already sleeping in separate beds, I see.
“You know that Andromeda woman in town? I bed she would make a better wife than you.” ~Kory
“Don’t count on it, you dolt.” ~Iama
I needed to get poor Korey out of the house, so I sent him on a mission, to find his replacement slob and the heiress’s future husband! So off to downtown you go, in the snow, again.
I sent him first to the place I found him, with no luck. Just a bunch of weirdo residents and a vampre.
OK, leave the vending maching alone, Korey. Let’s go somewhere else before Count Colby targets you.
“Woo, that Porsha chick is so hot!” ~Gregory
“Couldn’t agree with you more!” ~Colby
About half an hour into looking, who wouldn’t wonder onto the scene than my simself’s dear old fuddy duddy ex, out of his Repunzel tower.
“You can’t control me on other lots. I am my own man here!” ~Karl
Suuuuuuuure.
“Glad to meet you, Karl! My wife has mentioned you a couple of times around the house and when she’s arguing with me or sometimes in bed or something…” ~Korey
“Oh, you married Iama?! Yeah, she’s a great woman. I haven’t heard from her in a while, you know, being trapped in a tower and all. I would like to see her some time! Where do you live?” ~Karl
OK, so let’s move on shall we, Korey? The new male slob definitely wasn’t here.
“Hey, Linda Alioto! I haven’t seen you in ages! How’s the whole, still living as a slob thing going on?!” ~Korey
“Oh, it’s great Korey! I’m still showing the new girl Brittany the ropes, but it’s great! Still never have to bathe, get to fart whenever I want to! We miss you, dude!” ~Linda
“I miss you too babe, man, you have no idea how much I miss you…” ~Korey
Uh-oh. Seems like someone hasn’t gotten over an old crush, I’m guessing…
Yep. That’s your soul mate right there Korey.
“How DARE you spy on me again you… wait, why am I here again?” ~Sabrina
Finding the new male slob wasn’t going very well, but that was a while down the road anyway. The girls were still teens. But they still wanted to date, so I scratched up some money for a $30 dollar date for the girls. As figured, I didn’t get any lookers.
“You expect me to date this dog?!” ~Bayonette
“Actually, I was talking about the kid, not the dalmation.” ~Nikki
Silhouette got some kid named Orlando, or whatever, I don’t know, she wasn’t so thrilled on him either.
It’s only temporary, just long enough to boost the failing aspiration meters!
“So, uh, Alon, I think that’s your name, I was thinking that you have really pretty, uh, blonde hair…” ~Bayonette
“You know, I really don’t want to get mixed up with legacy types like you, so I think I will pass on this…” ~Alon, I think
“Oh… OK…” ~Bayonette
Well, I know one townie brat that is never going to college in his lifetime!!
“Wow, boobies!” ~Orlando
“Hey, keep your hands to yourself over there!” ~Nikki
Silhouette and Orlando were actually having a really good date. Silhouette seems more like the friendly type. Over the top nice sims never seem to have any luck in my game, such as Bayonette over there.
“You admire me, Bayonette? Wow, I’ve never been admired in my life before!” ~Alon
“You are just such a swell guy, Alon! They way you don’t let your disability of you not having hands affect your life in any way is admirable!” ~Bayonette
“But… I HAVE hands. they are stuck through my jacket…” ~Alon
“See? I have them, and they are telling you that you can’t hug me!” Now back off! Nice girls like you are no fun anyway!” ~Alon
Fine, Alon. You aren’t getting this date anywhere anyway. Get off her lawn.
Meanwhile, Silhouette had a happy date with that brunette kid and had her first kiss. Aw. At least I have one happy sim on the lot.
“Wow, you kissed this one?! She is pretty! Get out of the way Orlando, it’s my turn to kiss Silhouette!” ~Alon
Dammit Alon, no one here likes you! Get OFF the lot before I send Iama out here!”
Well, forget Iama. She wouldn’t know which of them is her child. Korey, on the other hand, is the kid of father that won’t let little dirty boys touch his little angels!
“You little perv, kissing my sweet girl like that! I outta do something my wife would do if I didn’t have the nice points!” ~Korey
“Oh dad.” ~Silhouette
“Meanwhile, who wouldn’t come by on a night visit other than KARL, still not in his tower.
“Hey, Korey was the one that called and wanted to hang out. I guess this is where Iama lives, huh…” ~Karl
“Oh, KARL! I thought I would never SEE you again! I knew that old, stupid ex of yours couldn’t keep us separated for long! I knew you and I were going to be together again one day!” ~Iama
“Oh, darling. Not even a tall stone tower could keep me away from you! When I finally figure out how to get out of this situation we are in, we are going to run away together, just you and me, and take off somewhere like Paris or Milan, or somewhere where dumb ole’ Sabrina and that stupid husband of yours will never find us!” ~Karl
“Speaking of her husband, where is Korey? Why isn’t he out here pummeling you?!” ~Neditkyli
“Sigh, I’m just so tired. Playing video games for a living and watching TV and then chasing boys off the lawn is just too much work. I’m going to sleep in my single bed. I don’t want anything waking me up for at least twelve hours.” ~Korey
Korey, you lazy slob! Your wife is outside breaking my rules! Do something! Oh, why am I expecting you to do anything besides fart anyway?!
“We have finally found each other! It’s a fairy tale come true!” ~Iama
“That is so wrong.” ~Neditkyli
“Tell me about it. Poor Korey.” ~Kaylynn
Shut up Kaylynn, you hypocrite.
“Not in THIS town, I’m not!” ~Kaylynn
“I’m going to work, Iama. See you this afternoon.” ~Korey
“Alright, bye.” ~Iama
“Oh babe, I came as soon as you called and told me your husband was gone for the day. I hope you don’t mine, but I brought a friend!” ~Karl
“Um, it’s OK, it’s just going to be you and me today anyway, baby!” ~Iama
“Dude, I don’t even know you and I know you two are doing the wrong thing. I don’t like either of you.” ~Noelle
That’s my girl, Noelle! That’s why I like you!
“HAH! Didn’t think I would find out about this little meeting, DID YOU?! I have my WAYS, Iama, and trust me, you have evoked my wrath now!” ~Sabrina
“Where did she come from?” ~Karl
“She’s the simself. She knows all and is everywhere we are.” ~Noelle
“Creepy.” ~Karl
“Oh, what? What you going to do, kill me again?! I’m a legacy founder and if you want that platinum bar, you aren’t going to do anything! Now why don’t you scurry back to your little tree house fort or whatever you live in and leave me be with my beloved!” ~Iama
“I think she has you on that whole perma-plat thing, Sabrina.” ~Noelle
“Fine, you have me this time. But trust me. I WILL find a way to mess this up for you. I HAVE ways.” ~Sabrina
“Are you really scared about what Sabrina will do to you about this? She is the player after all. She knows boolprop!” ~Noelle
“Pfft, I ain’t scared. She won’t do anything to me, she can’t! All she can do is wait until I live out life and die. Big deal!” ~Iama
“No one likes you know, Noelle. Get out.” ~Karl
“Oh Iama, your singing is devine!” ~Karl
“No, that’s the high pitch scream of me losing my hand to the wall! Call an ambulance!” ~Iama
“Oh, NO! My mom in the arms of another man! Oh, I hope dad doesn’t find out about this mess!” ~Bayonette
“Find out about what mess, dear?” ~Korey
“Oh no, DAD!” ~Bayonette
Actually, Korey almost made it to the bathroom before he realized his wife was with his friend.
“WHAT?! IAMA?! With KARL?! Oh say it can’t be so!” ~Korey
“Oh no, now my parents are going to divorce, aren’t they?!” ~Bayonette
“Oh the shame! I need to go to my room and cry, GET OUT OF MY WAY!” ~Bayonette
“Ha ha, that’s funny, do it again!” ~Karl
So now everyone is furious with each other. Great.
“I can’t believe she would do that and stand there and sleep like everything is OK, after all I have done for her! What did I do so wrong to deserve this?” ~Korey
“Sooo, let me get this right. You are getting revenge on your wife by going on a date with me, is that right?” ~Linda
“You bet! You have no idea how much stress I am under, so I think this will be just great, dear!” ~Korey
“Hey, do you have anything that tastes like baseball?” ~Korey
“Wait… I… I can’t do this date. I love Iama too much. I’m sorry Linda, but I got to go back and figure out what to do now!” ~Korey
“Ew, he farted!” ~Waitress 1
“I know, it’s hilarious!” ~Waitress 2
I have to break into the story right quick. I couldn’t go on with the storyline and playing with my legacy lot until I found the male slob that replaced Korey. I had to find the man that was going to marry the heiress before I went further or I would bug myself to death about it.
The thing was, I searched everywhere. I checked every lot downtown and even tried looking around with my simself, seeing as it was probably quicker if I used a sim that I could maxmotive and look around longer with
I spent three whole hours running around downtown, and found a lot of sims running around, like townies I hadn’t seen forever, vampires, mostly vampires, and by vampires, I mean Contessa
“BLEH!” ~Contessa
“Back off.” ~Townie
I was starting to think that this game didn’t generate a replacement for Korey and I was starting to think that the legacy was going to end before it even really started. I felt like a failure, and I knew it was time for some deeper investigation.
I boolpropped and boolpropped and played around, enlisting the help of my DeBug lot, because I don’t fear experimentation over there, even though it’s not safe anywhere when I think about it. It was starting to look like one really bad acid trip from the 60s or something in my sims game.
“You know what, Death? I think this whole lot would look great if you killed everyone here! What do you think?” ~Bayonette
Bayonette, what are you even DOING here?! Go home, this is not kid’s stuff! This is your FUTURE!
After a while, a horrible realization dawned on me. Brittany, the new slob in town, was not just some random new townie that I foolishly thought she was before! She WAS Korey’s replacement! Unlike the new Mr. Big that replaced Geoffery or the new Diva that replaced Jennifer, the slobs aren’t gender specific! That was the only explanation! And if that was the case, my legacy was screwed!
By the way, this is a fairly accurate depiction of the game area. Actually, after I took this picture, my mom painted the room black because she has lost her mind. Oh well.
BUT THAT’S NOT THE POINT! The point is, my legacy was in jeopardy, and I was running out of solutions! I have actually spend the past three weeks before posting this trying to find conclusions to my dilemma, and so far, I’m worried about rule breaking and the point being ruined of my legacy and it’s matriarchal system!
“Day 25, and still no sign of a male slob! This is an elusive creature that has evaded my capture so far and has proven to be my biggest challenge yet! But I swear I won’t give up! I will take to the skies for as long as possible until I find one!” ~Sabrina
“Ugh, Sabrina! You have been playing pilot for two weeks on this pile of trash! Now get off that thing and come inside so we can eat!” ~Whitney
“You are just jealous that I can build a plane out of yard scraps! Behold, Whit! I am the McGyver of sims!” ~Sabrina
“A plane?! This thing doesn’t even have a motor!” ~Whitney
“Haters gonna’ hate, Whitney!” ~Sabrina
“Whatever! I’m going in and having a grilled cheese, whether you are coming or not!” ~Whitney
While I was sky searching for that missing male slob, I came up with some conclusions to my legacy problem:
I could try for a male heir, and just have it go both ways, but now that Iama and Korey hate each other, will I even have time to fix their relationship in time to create a baby boy before Iama goes sterile?
Should I boolprop a male slob into existance? I don’t want to, because that feels like some really bad cheating would go down.
Or could I move all the girl slobs to a lot until a male is created randomly?
If anyone has any good ideas, tell me! Until then, I will be trying to fix this problem on my own! Until next time, happy simming!
But wait, there’s one more thing I have to do before I go…
“YOU PUT KARL IN A DRESS?!” ~Iama
“I SURE DID! I TOLD you I was going to make you feel my wrath! You should have known better! Now he wants nothing to do with you now! He thinks he’s a lady now!” ~Sabrina
“I’M A PREEEEEETTY GIRL!” ~Karl
“I hate the world.” ~Iama
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